Archive for September, 2009

In the Trees

So pregnancy has left me a little tired. A lot tired. I feel guilty sometimes because I feel so lazy…but I just remind myself I need the rest. So, I’ve been slacking on my bible study and in prayer.  I want to do it in the mornings because it has such an effect on my day…but I just feel like crap in the mornings and the last thing I wanna do is think.

So, the other morning I went in to get my coffee.  I am simply tolerating coffee right now because I am addicted to it.  The love and passion for the aroma and taste is gone.  My sweet husband makes it for me before he leaves for school so I dont have to.

I walk in, and there is a note on the counter from Daniel.  Just a sweet little note saying that he prayed God would show me somehow today that He loves me.

I think, “Eh…probably wont happen after I have been such a slacker lately on seeking Him.”

I go sit down on the couch to sip my coffee and I look out our back door into the backyard.  We are blessed with like a million trees…so its a pretty sight in the mornings when the sun is shining through the leaves.

 I’m looking out there and as big and bright as day…there in the trees…is Jesus’ face. Now, of course not His actual physical face…but His face outlined in the trees.  Not kidding.  The light and shadows were just perfect to where there right before me were his eyes…eyebrows…nose…mouth…hair…beard…one side of his shoulder.  It was breathtaking.  I honestly just sat there…stunned.

I would stare and then look somewhere else…then look back to make sure I wasnt hallucinating.  Now you might say…”well, it could’ve been made out to be any man.”  No, it was Jesus.  And it was big too! 

And as I watched and cried…the light would shift…and as it did, His laugh lines were illuminated by the light…and then…TEETH!  He was smiling!…at me!!!

I cant tell you in words what that felt like…like nothing I’ve really ever felt before. You know sometimes we get so used to church and churchy things and so used to hearing things we’ve heard for so long…that we need sometimes just a big dose of Jesus…and a big dose of the realization of His love for us.

He is so real…and so sweet.  Why He decides to love us so uniquely and so creatively and so tenderly is beyond me.  I cant comprehend it…cant fathom it.  Just so thankful for it!

He was there again this morning! It sure does make praying easier when I’m looking at His face out my back door!! A magical start to the day!  I love you my sweet Jesus!


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Don and Brin

Well, I finished A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.  It was a very good read.  I didnt like the ending though.  It disappointed me.  I like beautiful BAM! endings…romantic ones…Ok, ones where there is love and the man and woman end up together and they run into each others arms and say they are sorry and they kiss so sweetly and you know everything is right.

And while I am ever so sure Don would say the book ended romantically…and in some ways it did…His life became so much more of the story He was wanting and needing to live…I just, nevertheless, want the relational romance.

I am really excited to hear Don speak in November.  I have wondered what I would say if I get to meet him.  You know writers are different from other celebrities.  So, I’m thinking there is a chance.

And I seriously have the perfect girl for him.  Her name, I think, is Brin. ( this could be her blog code name…not sure if people do that…my name is really Lauren for the record) Anyways, she is on my blogroll.  She is so talented as a writer and someone you just feel like you have known forever.  I dont know her, I just found her blog one day and really loved it.  When reading some of her blogs I immediately thought her and Donald would make a wonderful pair!!

I promise I am not insane…but I’m thinking about telling Don about her…you know…just to check out her blog…read her stuff. I mean, why not, right?! 

You may be thinking…”Lauren, you are going to go talk to a famous author you have never met and try to fix him up with a girl who you have never met and these two people dont even know you exist or that each other exists!?”

Why yes I am…thanks for asking!!

Have a GLORIOUS thursday!!!!!

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The painting

Oh and sorry guys…the painting sucked. Maybe when I paint one that is even just OK, I will post it.  Thanks for the encouragement!

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A Beautiful Story

Growing up I was a very scared child. Just scared of everything.  Still deal with that to a degree. So when it came to ambitions and dreams…they were few.  Not that they werent great and worthy dreams…they were just few.  I had no clear direction in college…hence the non completion thereof.  I couldnt justify going through college just to get the peice of paper.


My dreams were simple.  I wanted to be married to a wonderful man and I wanted to have children and be a wonderful mother.


Sooooooooooooo…I am there.  I have an amazing husband that I dont deserve and I have a beautiful magical little girl that is almost two and I have one on the way.  And while I am enormously grateful for each of these elements of the story God is telling and writing…I am wanting more but have zero clue what.


I am currently reading Donald Millers new book entitled  “A million miles in a thousand years”…in which he talks about story and how the elements of story can actually be applied to our lives and how there are forces (satan and his demons) who do their best to keep us from living out the incredible story God is wanting to tell through our lives.  It is an amazing read so far and I am learning a lot…a lot of what I think I already knew deep down. A quote from the book…


“It made me wonder if the reasons our lives seem so muddled  is because we keep walking into scenes  in which we, along  with the people around us, have no clear idea of what we want.”


I have no clue what I want.  Do I want a better house, a Tahoe (that is the official vehicle on the Eastern shore), a top notch school system for my kids, a ho hum job, a good retirement plan, a condo by the beach…then die? NO!!!! I know I dont want any of that. I want something more. I want to reach the end of life and say..”Wow.”  I want to live a story. One that isnt boring.  One that isnt focused entirely on my kids because one day they will be gone and parenting will be done and I dont want to sit around the house wondering where the story has gone.


We are brain washed ya know.  We are so comfortable living boring lives.  We are so trapped by the fear of change and the fear of what could be…that we never step into the story and become the character we are supposed to be.


So here’s a list of eleven…a starting point…of things I want…things I desire to come to pass…seriously I just came up with them:


1. Teach and live out faith in front of our children

2. Work at the Womens Center for a long time and bring as many women to Christ as I can and have a huge impact on the Pro-Life movement.

3.  Be a part of a childrens home…start a childrens home or orhpanage.

4.  Sell paintings.

5. Go to Africa. ( you have no idea how scared I am of this)

6. When I am 60…still be so in love with Daniel and hug and kiss in front of everybody.

7.  Still look beautiful and in shape when I get older.

8. Write a book.

9. Speak in front of people.

10.  Make a music video.

11. Be so in love with Jesus that the sound of His name brings me to tears, makes me melt, forces me to burst out into song, and leads me to talk about Him to people I dont even know.


A lot of these things frighten the daylights out of me…but I am so tired of the enemy stealing my story!!!!


So, whats your story going to look like…will it be boring…or will it be an epic…


What is it that you want….

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Painters block

I have painters block.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my artistic abilities or lack of.

I dont really understand. I know God has given me some degree of artistic talent and I dont know why.  I’ve pondered this a lot.  Obviously He gives people talent so that He would be glorified in and through that talent…but what happens when the talent is very mediocre and scarce…when it seems as though you and that gift are playing hide and seek and you come up very empty and very dry?

Do you quit seeking? I have quit seeking for a while now.  Thats how it will go.  I will paint and then get so frustrated that everything I paint is so lame that I just give up.  Time goes by and I dont give it a thought.  And then…I see something or experience something and it all comes back…the longing to create…the longing to paint something beautiful and feminine…something original and memorable…something that someone would deem worthy enough to buy and put above their couch or their toilet…because that is one of the greatest honors…

You see…I cant just paint for me…I want to paint things that people would buy and hang in their homes…

I think my problem may lie in that I see art, for me, as all or nothing.  I want to either paint and be successful at it…or not do it at all…is that wrong?  I know many artists who would be baffled at that statement…because to them the art and creating it is an end in itself…if they are successful at it then that is the icing on the cake. Not me.

Oh well.  I’ll stop my ramblings and maybe paint for a little while while Maris is sleeping soundly… Maybe I’ll post a picture of it when I’m through…

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Telling the truth…like Publix

Today you get a peek into the side of me some might call…nerdy.

Marketing/Advertising… and the lack there of… fascinates me.

It fascinates me and it infuriates me.  It infuriates me when a product or business makes some high claim or promises something and then…LIES.  It happens all the time.  Hair care products, vacuum cleaners, Winn Dixie, Drain-O…

they all make claims …”its getting better all the time”…yeah, whatever

I also love coming up with ideas about what I would do to truly make something not just better but spectacular if I were the owner/entreprenuer/CEO…

For example, the old gem Gambino’s in Fairhope I believe has closed and is opening a Papa’s Place.  Ok, Gambinos is simply one of Fairhope’s trademarks if you ask me….yes, the food wasnt that great…yes, it smelled like mothballs….yes, the service was ho-hum…but why would you just sell it off?  If it was me calling the shots, I would tear the whole place down and start from ground up.  I would build a charming little unique Italian eatery called Gambino’s that would serve some of the finest wine and Italian dishes this side of the Gulf Coast.  I wouldnt advertise, I would build on making it something beautiful, something memorable, and then let the customers spread the word. I wouldnt make some bogus claim like…”the best Italian restaurant outside of Italy!” or “when your here, its like your in Italy!”

I digress.

One place that fascinates me and actually tells the truth is Publix.  They simply say…”Publix…where shopping is a pleasure.”  And they are dead on.  I live 2 minutes from Winn Dixie but I will drive 10 to Publix because it is such a pleasure shopping there.  The products are great…the workers there are so friendly…and it truly is delightful.  Me and Maris leave there so happy. I have my fresh baked bread and she has her balloon and we are good.

If all places and products could simply live up to their promises…or just not make them in the first place.  Oh well, cant win em all…

Have a great weekend!!

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I am so in love with fall… mainly because of the food.  I think food just tastes better, smells better, and looks better in fall.  For lunch today we had turnip greens and cornbread…one of my fav’s.  I am trying to decide when to make the first batch of pumpkin bread and the first pumpkin pie.  I think early September may be a little to soon…after all…it is still around 80 degrees here most days.

I am really passionate about food and cooking and I think I am too harsh in my head toward people who arent.  Cooking, for a lot of people, is quite the unbearable chore and is best left to Marie Calendar’s or something really easy and simple.  Cooking is just not their thing and ya know what…thats ok!  If everyone loved to cook and bake we’d probably get used to it and wouldnt appreciate it anyway.

I just love doing things the ole fashioned way.  I think there is something romantic and magical about making things authentically…making them from scratch…getting your hands dirty in the kitchen.  When people come over for dinner or when I get to make a dessert I want it to not only be very good…but I want it to show that I really cared about serving something wonderful…not just slapping something together because I have to.  I would even say that it is a kind of ministry for me. 

I often times think about what the food will be like in Heaven.  I know the Bible says it will be a feast with the best wine, the best meats ( the Washhouse or Ruth Chris will have nothing on a Filet in Heaven), the best cheese, and I’m sure….I’m positive….the best Pumpkin Pie. 

I hope your days will be  filled with the aroma’s, sights, and tastes of a truly magical autumn.  If not, you can come over to my house…I’ll be baking and cooking up a storm!

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